Tonight John and I sat down and played guitars. We’ve been going out five years and I don’t think we’ve ever done that before! I just kept calling out tunes and he’d follow along, we did ten or fifteen of ‘em. It was a lot of fun, we’ll have to do it again real soon. I need the practice, for my voice and my hands too. My left hand gets really shaky trying to hold the chords down. I’d be worried about arthritis except that it’s always been that way when I haven’t been practicing. Really I just need a better guitar! My red guitar’s pretty hard to play, and some chords are literally impossible to play due to the worn-out frets. Maybe soon I’ll be able to get a new guitar… my grandparents sold their house and are giving me and Lucie some money, just because they want to. Maybe a new guitar is in order… one that I can play without pain, and a new amplifier that won’t literally blow up onstage like my cheapo Peavey’s done, not once, not twice but three times!!! And a new pair of shoes, that’s the ticket. :-)
Every night for the past week, me and John have been watching that 7-part series of specials on blues music that Scorcese did for PBS. We’re getting it on TiVo. I can’t get enough of it, it gives me the chills and makes me cry and makes me want to play all day long every day. In a way I feel like, as a white girl, I’ll never really truly get it… it’s not really my music is it? Unless you were there, unless you lived it you’ll never really understand. But in another way I feel like it’s just as much a part of my soul as any other music, maybe more. This is going to sound stupid but… I really wish there’d been no slavery back then. I feel bad that my ancestors acted that way, I wish white people hadn’t ever treated black people so badly. I wish all that had never happened, it makes me want to cry. Lord have mercy. Such beautiful music, beautiful people. I wish we’d all grown up together not knowing what it’s like to consider somebody else as any better or worse than ourselves. It’s just so fucked up!!!!!!!