I got home this morning/afternoon and there wasn’t any letter under the door or anything. But the bedroom was a wreck… I have this wire closet-system thingy attached to the wall and for some reason it had fallen down. I guess I had too much stuff hanging on it, and blankets and sheets and towels piled on top of it, and maybe I didn’t put it in very well in the first place. It’s just weird that it would hold up all that shit for six months and then decide to fall down NOW, on the same day that I’m all paranoid about my landlady. It left some pretty good holes in the wall, too, so that’ll be one more thing for her to bitch about, if she sees it!! I’m a complainer and a namecaller and now I’m destroyin’ the walls, PERfect. I’d better find a couple of posters and put ‘em over those holes before morning.

I hung out with Ryan for awhile before I came home… went to the Hollywood, this 24-hour diner close by. We met George and Nate there for breakfast. So we had three out of five Jive Councilmen in one booth, plus me, and Nate’s little cutiepie baby boy Sam in a high-chair. After that we all went over to this video arcade to play some games. George and Ryan are both really into those racing games where you pay 75 cents and sit down in the car seat. I’m not too good at those games… I played it once and did alright but I had way more fun on the old-school machines like Centipede, Ms. Pac-Man and Galaga. They had a couple of pinball machines too — I sucked on their Twilight Zone. I used to be so good on that one.

Anyway, me and Ryan eventually came over to my place, sat down for awhile and watched a video. ("Faster Pussycat Kill Kill" — can’t see that too many times!). He took off ‘cuz he had to go pick up a suit and some shoes which he accidentally left at the Metro last night. He’s going see "Jackie Brown" with George, too, but I decided to pass on that.

I’m kind of at loose ends here… I don’t really want to clean up the mess of clothes in the bedroom because I’m not sure whether I should try to rebuild the closet system or start packin’ all my stuff into boxes to get ready to move! It really sucks, that argument we had. The lady’s really got me on pins and needles now — I really really wish I had more self-control sometimes with that tongue of mine. I should have known I was dealing with somebody who wasn’t all there, who really wasn’t going to try to work out the problem with me in any way shape or fashion. And I should never have let it get to me, I should have just walked away. She doesn’t speak English all that well but she could see I was getting angry at her and I could see the power she was getting from that… there was this look of glee in her eyes. Like she was thinking — "This little hippie thinks she can tell me how to run my own building? I’ll show her." Oh, it just gets me so upset. She refused to accept my apology for little bad word that escaped from my mouth. (By the way, I said it under my breath as I was turning away from her, not straight to her face… I’m not that brash.) I wish so much that I hadn’t done that — not because I don’t genuinely feel that way about her but because it was a case of shooting myself in the foot. If I hadn’t said that one little word, there wouldn’t be all this worrying about whether I’m going to be evicted or not. It could still happen — she could be waiting for Monday or waiting until Jan. 1st when I go to pay my rent. I guess I’ll only know everything’s okay if she accepts and cashes my next rent check. But either way, I’ve got to find another place to live pretty soon; I can’t trust that lady as my landlord. But hopefully it can wait until after winter’s over, at least.

Gawd, I’m sorry. Listen to me, ranting and raving about my stupid PROblems again. ugggghhhhh. Well, I’ll log off now… I really do have better things to do than bitch about stuff, I swear! ;-)